I Peter 3:1-4 says, "In the same way, you wives, be submissive to your own husbands so that even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior. Your adornment must not be merely external - braiding the hair, and wearing gold jewelry, or putting on dresses; but let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God."
Do you ever hear yourself say "poor me?”, wishing your husband would do more around the house or with the kids? Do you ever find yourself getting angry or frustrated when your children wake up early from naps, interrupting your "me time" of the day? I do . If Ava wakes up at 6am and not 7:30 like normal, I feel like I have lost out on my morning alone. I am not a joyful person when I go to pick her up from the crib. Sometimes my workload and all the expectations of everyone around me can seem overwhelming. In these times, I am robbed of that meek and quiet spirit.
Meek - mild of temper, soft, gentle, not easily provoked or irritated
Quiet - peaceable, not turbulent, not giving offense, mild, meek and contented.
Ouch! I am definitely not meek and quiet. Instead I find myself feeling bitterness, loneliness and anger/frustration. My focus is often on myself and not on the Lord. I need take captive my thoughts as Paul describes in 2 Corinthians 10:5.God has pointed me toward scripture for encouragement.....He created me as a help mate to my husband. How often I have it the other way around?! God has called me to be a mother and a wife, and that requires helping my husband in every way and training my children. Both can be difficult. Both can be overwhelming. And both can seem lonely at times. But they don't have to be.
I have always struggled with becoming easily frustrated or irritated with Nate, and now my children. I have been so convicted of whether I truly love them or not, for God says, "Love is patient, love is kind." In the NKJV, it says, "Charity suffereth long, and is kind." Am I truly willing to suffer long for my husband and children? I have been desiring a gentle spirit ever since I had Annabelle, and along with gentleness comes meekness and quietness.
Anger is something so heavy on my heart, because I am now realizing how I display it every hour of the day, either through irritation or impatience. Anger and bitterness creep into these situations when I am more concerned about my inconveniences or difficulties than I am about my child's long-term character growth or my service to God through serving my husband. But I have confidence that the Joy of the Lord can be my strength. He has not called me to do more than He will provide time or energy for. When my focus is right, I will work diligently and for the Lord, and then I will be grateful for anything my husband does to help or anytime my daughters do well and obey.
A few things that have been helpful lately that Nate and I have been working on are:
* Consistent discipline with predetermined consequences
* Always speaking softly and gently...always
* Taking time out of the day to simply train Annabelle to do those things that I seem to nag herabout because I expect her to do them well already.
* Always have high goals for the kids but low expectations. I find that I can become frustrated or lose patience when my expectations for the kids aren't met. But as long as I expect them to fail and still need training, then I can remain calm and patient.
